CHATTANOOGA (The Borowitz Report)—Employing the fear tactics that have typified his midterm campaigning, Donald J. Trump told a rally audience on Sunday that electing Democrats would drag the nation back to the dark days of tolerance and decorum.
Trump made his closing argument to the Chattanooga, Tennessee, audience by raising the spectre of a return to the dignified and restrained discourse that plagued the nation during the regime of his predecessor, Barack Obama.
“We had eight years of talking about people of different genders, races, and nationalities as if they were human beings,” Trump warned. “Do we want to go back to that?”
“No!” the crowd shouted.
“Do we want our public figures to consider the consequences of their words and actions?” he asked.
“No!” they thundered.
Appearing on Fox News, Vice-President Mike Pence defended Trump against charges that he was irresponsibly stoking his supporters’ worst fears about a return to compassion and civility.
“This election is about whether we, as a nation, want to move forward or backward,” Pence said. “And I have faith that the American people want to keep moving backward.”
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