“The great source of
both the misery and disorders of human life, seems to arise from over-rating
the difference between one permanent situation and another. Avarice over-rates
the difference between poverty and riches: ambition, that between a private and
a public station: vain-glory, that between obscurity and extensive reputation.
The person under the influence of any of those extravagant passions, is not
only miserable in his actual situation, but is often disposed to disturb the
peace of society, in order to arrive at that which he so foolishly admires. The
slightest observation, however, might satisfy him, that, in all the ordinary
situations of human life, a well-disposed mind may be equally calm, equally
cheerful, and equally contented. Some of those situations may, no doubt,
deserve to be preferred to others: but none of them can deserve to be pursued
with that passionate ardour which drives us to violate the rules either of
prudence or of justice; or to corrupt the future tranquillity of our minds,
either by shame from the remembrance of our own folly, or by remorse from the
horror of our own injustice.” Adam Smith, The Theory of
Moral Sentiments
***
http://www.ted.com/talks/dan_gilbert_asks_why_are_we_happy.html
Dan Gilbert:
The surprising science of happiness
Dan Gilbert, author of "Stumbling on Happiness," challenges the idea that we’ll be miserable if we don’t get what we want. Our "psychological immune system" lets us feel truly happy even when things don’t go as planned.
Harvard psychologist Dan Gilbert says our beliefs about what will make us happy are often wrong -- a premise he supports with intriguing research, and explains in his accessible and unexpectedly funny book, Stumbling on Happiness. Full bio »
Natural happiness is what we get when we get what we wanted, and synthetic happiness is what we make when we don’t get what we wanted. In our society, we have a strong belief that synthetic happiness is of an inferior kind.” (Dan Gilbert)
Natural happiness is what we get when we get what we wanted, and synthetic happiness is what we make when we don’t get what we wanted. In our society, we have a strong belief that synthetic happiness is of an inferior kind.” (Dan Gilbert)
***
Greetings,
This TED Talk has been viewed nearly 4,000,000 times, much more often than most.
The presenter -- Harvard professor Dan Gilbert -- has a delivery that's a bit blustery, but engaging as well.
As a lover of paradox -- and a believer in Lao Tzu's (Laozi's) observation that "The profoundest truths are paradoxical" -- there is much to like here.
Gilbert's talk is also relieving.
It happens that happiness comes much more easily than we think - almost by default, if indeed we let the default operate.
Writing the previous sentence I saw likely etymological relationship between "happen" and "happiness." Here's how it plays out:
late 14c., "lucky, favored by fortune, prosperous;" of events, "turning out well," from hap (n.) "chance, fortune" + -y (2). Sense of "very glad" first recorded late 14c. Ousted O.E. eadig (from ead "wealth, riches") and gesælig, which has become silly. Meaning "greatly pleased and content" is from 1520s. O.E. bliðe "happy" survives as blithe. From Greek to Irish, a great majority of the European words for "happy" at first meant "lucky." An exception is Welsh, where the word used first meant "wise."
I would guess that "hap" - as in "happenstance" - is nearer the origin than "glad, wise, prosperous" and "turning out well." (Keep this in mind when you listen to Gilbert.)
As Buddhists point out, happiness begins with detachment for detachment is the antidote to tanha, the Sanskrit word for "thirst" craving and desire. (Tanha is represented as a reflex, not a decision. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tanha)
As Dan Gilbert points out, happiness is well nourished by detaching from fixated, self-punishing obsessions with "images" of how our lives MUST TURN OUT.
I'm reminded of Cockburn's lyric, "If I loose my grip, will I take flight?"
Studio version: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nPDKWnA54fQ
Live version: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qiUJEafu1lA
Love
Daddy man
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