The Borowitz Report: N.R.A. Leader Warns Of Rising Cost Of Senators

HOUSTON — National Rifle Association C.E.O. Wayne LaPierre used his opening speech at the N.R.A.’s national convention today to highlight several challenges facing the organization, including what he called “the rising cost of Senators.”

“Over the past few years, we’ve seen the price of purchasing a Senator surge astronomically,” he told the N.R.A. faithful. “Unless something is done to make Senators more affordable, the ability of a tiny lobbying group to overrule the wishes of ninety per cent of the American people will be in jeopardy.”

The days are over, he said, when “you could buy a Chuck Grassley (R-Iowa) for little more than pocket change.”

“Now it costs thousands to purchase a marginally effective Senator like Kelly Ayotte (R-N.H.),” he said.

Mr. LaPierre was followed at the podium by the former Alaska governor Sarah Palin, the rock musician Ted Nugent, and several other people who would not pass background checks.

***

Here's Ted now...

Ted Nugent Calls Obama A "Piece Of Shit" "Supported By Pimps and Whores"

http://paxonbothhouses.blogspot.com/2012/11/republican-hero-ted-nugent-calls-obama.html

We're waiting Ted...

Maybe not.

Maybe so...

Here's Sodahead's picturesque appraisal of Nugent.

http://www.sodahead.com/united-states/would-anyone-like-to-meet-the-real-ted-nugent/question-2596765/

If Sodahead misrepresents Nugent, the question becomes, "Does the article malign Nugent, or whitewash him?"

Nugent is encrusted with enough scum to make Bob Davis look like Mother Theresa.

http://paxonbothhouses.blogspot.com/2013/05/a-right-wing-talk-show-host-to-make.html

http://paxonbothhouses.blogspot.com/2013/05/stephen-colbert-nra-and-background.html

***

Nugent's Wikipedia entry"

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ted_Nugent

Excerpt: "In 1978, Nugent began a relationship with seventeen-year-old Hawaii native Pele Massa. Due to the age difference they could not marry so Nugent joined Massa's parents in signing documents to make himself her legal guardian, an arrangement that Spin magazine ranked in October 2000 as #63 on their list of the "100 Sleaziest Moments in Rock".^[30][31]"

^***

^{Nugent's Wikiquote page"}

^{http://en.wikiquote.org/wiki/Ted_Nugent}

Excerpt: "Mitt Romney's Ted Nugent problems are much worse than the rocker’s threats against President Obama. Romney’s real issue is that he has accepted the endorsement of an admitted pedophile."

Jason Easley, "Is Mitt Romney Aware That Ted Nugent Is a Self-Admitted Pedophile?"

PoliticsUSA, (April 17, 2012)