Thursday, January 30, 2014

Borowitz: Humans More Closely Related To Neanderthals Than Originally Thought

MINNEAPOLIS (The Borowitz Report)—Human beings are more closely related to Neanderthals than originally thought, scientists confirmed today.
According to Professor Davis Logsdon, the chairman of the genetic science department at the University of Minnesota, the level of Neanderthal genes in a human may vary from person to person. “There are certain humans walking among us who are passing as humans but are really Neanderthals in human clothing, if you will,” he said.
He urged caution, however, in attributing brutish, beastly, or savage behavior to the amount of Neanderthal genes one possesses. “That’s really unfair to Neanderthals,” he added.


"GOP Politicians' Penchant For Heavy-Handed Thuggery. It's What They Do By Christ-ie!"

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