WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)—Saddened and more than a little wistful, Senate Republicans acknowledged on Tuesday that their long-standing dream of keeping poor people from living longer was at its end.
Choking back tears, Senator Lindsey Graham admitted that his crusade to halt the longevity of the poor had turned out to be a quixotic one at best.
“We made a solemn promise to the American people that we would do everything in our power to keep the poor from living so darn long,” he said, his voice quavering. “We didn’t get it done.”
While saying that he did not want to “play the blame game,” Graham could not resist pointing fingers at senators who broke ranks with the G.O.P. leadership over its quest to stall the poor’s unacceptably surging life expectancy.
“I always thought that preventing the poor from living longer was a bedrock Republican principle,” he said bitterly. “I guess I was wrong.”
On the House side, Speaker Paul Ryan urged Graham not to wallow in defeat but to move on to other Republican agenda items, like tax reform. “We may not be able to keep the poor from living longer, but we can still make them poorer,” he said.
The Hard, Central Truth Of Contemporary Conservatism
The hard, central "fact" of contemporary "conservatism" is its insistence on a socio-economic threshold above which people deserve government assistance, and below which people deserve to die.
The sooner the better.
Unless conservatives are showing n'er-do-wells The Door of Doom, they just don't "feel right."
To allay this chthonic anxiety, they resort to Human Sacrifice, hoping that spilled blood will placate "the angry gods," including the one they've made of themselves. http://paxonbothhouses.blogspot.com/2013/09/harvard-study-45000-americans-die.html
Having poked their own eyes out, they fail to see that self-generated wrath creates "the gods" who hold them thrall.
The Evangelical Persecution Complex
(Projection's Finest Hour)
Almost "to a man," contemporary "conservatives" have apotheosized themselves and now -- sitting on God's usurped throne -- are rabid to pass Final Judgment.
Self-proclaimed Christians, eager to thrust "the undeserving" through The Gates of Hell, are the very people most likely to cross its threshold.
Remarkably, although they are prone to believe all manner of Trumpeted nonsense, none of them are tempted to believe in their own spiritual peril.
The Pharisees Are Always With Us.
Here's What They "Look Like" Today
http://paxonbothhouses.blogspot.com/2017/03/the-pharisees-are-always-with-us-heres.html
But never mind.
If you can rationalize Trump, you can rationalize anything.
"The Hard, Central Truth Of Contemporary Conservatism"
Rep. Joe Kennedy III Tells "Christian" Trump-Care Supporters: Your So-Called "Mercy" Is "Malice"
Rep. Joe Kennedy III Tells "Christian" Trump-Care Supporters: Your So-Called "Mercy" Is "Malice"
The Cruel Old Party: The GOP’s Passage Of Trumpcare Is Unprecedentedly Callous
7 Years' Bitching About Obamacare While Continually Touting Their "Terrific, Low-Cost Replacement" And The GOP Produces Nothing But Flatulence, Excrement And Anguish For 25 Million Americans, Simultaneously Tranferring Hundreds Of Billions Of Dollars To The 1%
http://paxonbothhouses.blogspo
Abomicare: Trump's Titanic Failure
Abomicare: Trump's Titanic Failure
What's Missing From This Photo of Politicians Deciding the Future of Women's Health? Anyone?
Great NPR Summary Of The History And Current Status Of The GOP's "Healthcare Deprivation Act"
http://paxonbothhouses.blogspo
Great NPR Summary Of The History And Current Status Of The GOP's "Healthcare Deprivation Act"
http://paxonbothhouses.blogspo
The Partisan Divide: Do We Want Good Healthcare? Or Do We Want Political Chest-Thumping?
(It Goes Without Saying That American Conservatives Want Poor People To Die From Lack Of Care. And If They Want Care They Need To Pay For It.)
http://paxonbothhouses.blogspo
(It Goes Without Saying That American Conservatives Want Poor People To Die From Lack Of Care. And If They Want Care They Need To Pay For It.)
http://paxonbothhouses.blogspo
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