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Thursday, September 28, 2017

Borowitz: DeVos Did The Math On Trump’s Tax Plan. Says It Will Save Nation Eleventy Krillion

Betsy DeVos Did The Math On Trump’s Tax Plan And Says It Will Save The Nation Eleventy Krillion

WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)—In a ringing endorsement from the Secretary of Education, Betsy DeVos said on Thursday that she did the math on Donald Trump’s tax plan and that she estimates it will save the United States roughly eleventy krillion dollars.

“I took out a pencil and paper and figured it out the old-fashioned way,” DeVos told reporters. “I wound up going through a lot of paper, because eleventy krillion has ten hundredteen zeroes.”

DeVos stressed that the eleventy-krillion figure was actually a conservative estimate. “The exact number was between eleventy and ninety-quelve, but I rounded down to eleventy,” she said.

The Education Secretary said that the national debt, which currently stands at more than twenty trillion dollars, would be greatly reduced by the eleventy-krillion-dollar windfall.

“If you subtract eleventy krillion from twenty trillion, you get a number so small it has no name,” she explained.



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